Motley Crew

So I’ve joined up with this motley crew of adventury types… being highly skilled of course I was a shoe in for the job. They’ve even given me a nickname “NoobyPawnSacrifice” which is nice… not sure what language it is in but I’m sure it means hero or Mr Manly Man or something suitable for a Lord like myself.

Apparently Cola, the small black ..er… coloured girl is the brains of the operation. Her pointy teeth and catlike tail come from some thing bad in her ancestry where her mother was the victim of some sort of demonic spell. Nasty stuff I imagine… but she seems to have benefited by inheriting night vision and lightning fast reflexes. She also cuts a mean figure in leather, everything goes with black apparently.

Elfis, the buffoon in the white jumpsuit is a Bard. So far as I can tell his skills are in the are of playing guitar rather badly and getting in the way. He apparently is writing an epic poetic story about the group.. so if we live.. we shall be famous.

Then there’s Aaahnult the Minotaur. He’s the muscle… if something needs to be negotiated with he will negitiate it into lots of little bloody pieces. I think he’s the one who insists on bringing the elven prat in the jumpsuit because he tends to pose a lot. Posing works better with a soundtrack. Apparently they were attacked once by some nasty beast called a Becclehoff which infects one with occasional attacks of 80's slow motion montage... whatever that is.

The mad bastard outside on the box called Jeem Bo is also part of the troupe. When confronted with something they are calling the undead (I’m not sure what they are but the description (stinky cold bloodsucking bastards) makes me think of lawyers or bankers) he apparently has some power over them.

There is one other member apparently, a wizard or something who will be joining us soon. I hope he’s talented… or we’re all going to die horribly.

Oh… and the bulldog is the mascot… apparently he used to be a member of the group but something bad happened to him… not quite sure what that means. But I do wish he’d stop humping my leg.

Oh well…I think as I comb my hair and admire my reflection in a pool of spilled Slate… at least I’ll make leave a beautiful corpse.